Working with Worry and Anxiety

Anxiety is fear projected into the future or the past.
Fear has a purpose. It is the body’s way of keeping you alive. If a snake is near, fear tells you to move before your thinking brain catches up. You react fast and stay safe. Anxiety borrows that system but uses it in the wrong place and time. It is fear without the snake.

Listening Instead of Fighting

Anxiety is not your enemy. It is your nervous system trying to help, even if it has lost track of what is useful. Instead of pushing it away, pause and listen. What is anxiety trying to tell you? Is there something you can actually do? If yes, define a small, concrete step. Do that one thing. If there is nothing to do, thank the anxiety for trying to help. Then shift from thinking to sensing.

Pushing anxiety away keeps it louder. Listening quiets it.

The Smoke Detector

Think of anxiety like a smoke detector. Sometimes there is smoke and you need to act. Other times the detector is just beeping because the battery is low. Learn to tell the difference. If there is a real threat, take action. If it is a false alarm, work with your body and your breath until the beeping settles.

Finding It in the Body

Locate where you feel the anxiety. Describe the sensation without judgment: tightness, heat, buzzing, pressure, hollowness. Breathe slowly, especially on the exhale. Stay with the feeling instead of escaping it. Most of the time, just observing the sensation allows the intensity to shift and pass.

Talking to Anxiety

You can speak to anxiety as if it were a part of you trying its best.
I hear you. Thank you for warning me. I’ve got this.
Ask yourself: What would I tell a friend feeling this way? Is there something I can do that would make sense right now?

Checking the Story

Every feeling carries a story. Notice what story you are attaching to the anxiety.
Is it new or familiar?
Does it belong to the present moment or to something old that you have felt before?
Is it about something real or something you are predicting?
Sometimes anxiety repeats old habits that once protected you but no longer fit. Seeing that clearly helps you separate what is current from what is memory.

Questioning the Thought

When anxiety shows up as racing thoughts, slow them down. Name the thought exactly.
Ask: What is the evidence for this? What is the evidence against it?
Is there a more exact, balanced way to describe what is happening?
Would I say this to someone I love?
Replace the thought with one that includes facts but not fear.

Worst-Case Exploration

If a thought keeps looping, walk it through to the end.
What is the worst that could happen?
And if that happened, then what?
And then what?
Keep going until you reach the point where you realize you would still survive. Often the unspoken fear is what keeps anxiety alive. Saying it out loud brings it into light, where it loses power.

Emergency Mentality

Anxiety often rushes you to fix or decide immediately. That urgency is the body’s way of escaping the discomfort of not knowing. Notice the speed. Name it: “urge to fix.” Then pause. Observe, breathe, and choose instead of react.

When You Need More Support

If the anxiety is still strong, give it another channel. Write down what it is saying. Draw it. Move your body. Step outside and notice the air. These are ways of helping the body complete what it started without letting the mind spiral.

Bringing It Back to Meaning

Sometimes anxiety signals something real that needs your attention: a limit, a preparation, a conversation, or a boundary. Listen for that message. Use it. Do what needs to be done. Then return to your breath and your body.

A Simple Sequence

1. Notice the anxiety.

2. Ask what it is trying to protect you from.

3. See if there is something to do. If yes, do one small step.

4. If not, thank it and locate the feeling in your body.

5. Breathe, describe, and stay with it until it moves.

6. Question the story. Separate fact from prediction.

7. Follow the worst-case thought until you find what is really feared.

8. Slow the urge to fix. Choose your next action deliberately.

Anxiety becomes less frightening when you treat it as information rather than an intruder.
You do not need to silence it. You need to listen until it tells the truth.

Grounding for Anxiety:

1. Get out of your head by turning all your attention to the soles of your feet.

Feel the ground underneath them.

2. Practice your deep belly breathing.

3. Take a walk outside and observe the scenery. Name three colors, name three sounds, name three textures.

4. Remind yourself that you are anxious and therefore it is not a good time to draw conclusions about the future until you are calm.

5. Remind yourself that you are anxious and the feeling is temporary.

6. Focus on the anxious body sensations with compassion and curiosity and without judgment until they subside. Remember to breathe deeply as you focus.

7. Imagine a peaceful place or a time when you felt confident.

8. Imagine something soothing like beautiful music, or hot sun on your skin, or being hugged.

9. Do some exercise like jogging or yoga, or go to the gym.

Feeling moved by this exercise?
This is the kind of inner work that leads to real change—not just insight, but momentum. If you’re exploring personal development or seeking guidance through a transition, I offer one-on-one work that blends deep awareness with actionable clarity.

Awareness is about naming what matters.
Alignment is living in a way that honors it.
Action is choosing again and again to stay in integrity with yourself.

If this exercise stirred something and you’d like support in moving forward, you’re not alone.

Learn more about my approach to life consulting and relationship coaching here or get in touch for your free 30-minute consultation here!